Posts Tagged ‘single’

We walked into one of our favorite little hole in the wall diners and there he sat, in the corner, alone. Whether he wanted to be noticed or not, one could not help but be drawn to him. His hair was jet black except for the bright pink mohawk that ran down the center. His jet black hair somehow weaved into the pink mohawk making the mohawk take on an even more angular appearance. He had multiple face piercings and bulging biceps that any man would envy and any woman would fantasize over for days to come. The man was buff. 

We watched him leave. As he climbed into his sleek, black Mercedes, I watched the muscles in his leg ripple. This man obviously works out. We live in a small city which is still hickville by many standards and I am left wondering what type of employment this man has. Although he may be a resident in our town, something tells me that he is not. He is not a young teenager or a 20 something year old. He was well into his 30s and appeared to be very confident in who he was. So I ask you, dear reader, who was this stranger? 



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I’ve been putting off my lawn mower maintenance. For some reason I got it in my head that this would be a cumbersome task. I was wrong. It was a cinch and only took a few minutes. I changed the oil, the filter, the spark plug, added fuel additive, and cleaned it up. It’s funny how we procrastinate things expecting them to be difficult and then they take mere minutes. It’s also funny how these things are chalked up to  be a “man’s job” when they are really no big deal. There’s a certain power a woman discovers by being able to do a “man’s job” by herself.

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I AM Funny, Damnit!!

Have you ever noticed that on online dating profiles everyone claims to be funny? My question is simple. If all of these people are so funny, why isn’t this world a hell of a lot more fun? I have a hard time believing that Tom, Dick AND Harry are all funny. Tom might be funny. I’m going to guess that Dick is, well, you know. And Harry? Ok, now Harry, he’s funny! But all three of them? Nah. They aren’t all funny, not even close. Tom can be funny in the right circumstances, Dick is more uptight than not, you get the picture. Also, really, who defines funny? Here’s an eye opener for you…I define funny. Yep, me, myself and I. Just because you think you are funny, that means diddly squat to me. Prove it already and if you can’t prove it, don’t write it on your profile. 

Unlike all the people who claim to be funny, I really am. How do we know this? See above paragraph. I define funny. There you have it. Therefore, if I say that I am funny, I am. Deal with it. 

Seriously, I have noticed that the popular blogs for the most part are light-hearted and fairly comical. My blogs? Yeah, not so much. They are boring. Even I get bored when I write them, but I write them anyways. I am not sure why. I guess it’s just kind of nice to post things to the world. For instance, tonight, even though I was dead tired, I made myself file my taxes and I am very excited to be done with them. Now, who really cares about that? No one except my children and I who will now anxiously await my federal return so I can pay my state return (damnit). Oh well, I still end up posting it. 

So here’s the thing about me. I can be serious. I have to be serious in my career and as a parent. However, I use humor constantly throughout my day. I am known as being a funny person. So why can’t I write a funny blog? This really perturbs me. I am trying very hard to figure out how to be comical in my writing. Bare with me here….or is it bear with me? I will find my. In the meantime, any constructive criticism you have is helpful. nitch

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I spent MY Valentine’s Day babysitting. Well, not the day itself – I spent that sweeping, mopping the tile and the wood floors, vacuuming, cooking, more cleaning, cooking, getting my hair done, that type of stuff. At around 4:30, my friend who was in desperate need of a babysitter brought her daughter over. She had asked several teenagers to no avail, including my own daughter. Since my son and her daughter are friends, I figured, “Why not?” and extended the offer.

I must admit that in my book, this Valentine’s Day has been pretty swell. I am not big on the showy stuff. Even if I had a man, I wouldn’t really want to go out. There are simply too many people out on days like today. I have spent the last 5 hours listening to the kids play and it has done my heart well. My son is a little old man in a boy’s body. He doesn’t have patience for children and is usually annoyed by them. This pair has known each other for about 4 years now and they are like siblings. They used to have great fun pushing each other’s buttons, but lately the relationship has matured and they are becoming good friends. 

Not long ago my friend sent me a text message saying that she would be late and asking if that was ok. Shortly afterwards, I went to check on the kids after hearing a rather loud crash. The little girl commented that her mom would be back in two hours. I let her know that her mom was running late, they hadn’t even eaten dinner yet, and it would actually be closer to three hours. To this she replied, “You can tell my mom that I can just spend the night.” Ahhh, such a nice thing to hear and I would let her if I didn’t have plans in the morning. This evening is definitely showing me that I need to have children over for my son more often. We seem to be so busy running daughter/sister around that he kind of gets the brunt end of the stick. We need to change that. 

As for Valentine’s Day and dating, I think it’s so over rated. The irony is that it seems to be all of us single and dateless peeps that claim this. Here’s the thing with me that people just can’t seem to understand. I date. When I want to date, I have no problems finding a date. However, most of the time, I just don’t want to date. The last relationship that I was in, I had ended back in March. What I was wanting and what he was wanting were not the same thing. I was looking for a boyfriend, he was looking for someone to move in with, possibly to get married. I am not ready to go there. If I do get ready to go there, it will be a slow road. Actually, I think all of my relationships have ended this way. Here’s the thing, we aren’t talking long term relationships and my lack of commitment. We are talking relationships of only a couple of months at most and the man is wanting a wife and I’m just not ready to go there so we end it. One of my former “men” was in a relationship and engaged within three weeks of me ending it with him. Another was actually married a month and a half after we ended it. I seriously don’t get this. Men think women are out to get married, I must live in a backwards world or something! 

Anyway, I have digressed. My last relationship, I ended it and within a week or two afterwards, I landed myself in the hospital fighting for my life. It’s been 10 months since that time and I am doing well, but still technically in the recovery stages. The reality is that when you are healing, (eventually) working full time (again), going to school full time and raising children, there just isn’t enough time to date. I need my life to slow down a bit. I simply have no energy left to try to build a relationship. So, for now, I choose not to date. Where would I fit him into this crazy life of mine? I just don’t know.

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I am completely curious about this. It seems that advice books for women say not to put out on the first date if you are looking for a relationship. I was watching something on tv the other night, paying such close attention that I can’t even tell you what the show was or who the celebreties were, but the topic of sex on the first date was brought up. So the host asked these three male celebrities their opinion. I don’t really remember what two of them said. They may have said nothing or I had simply tuned them out, it’s hard to say. The third agreed that if a woman wanted a relationship, that she should not have sex on the first date. He then went on to say that despite his advice/opinon, he has actually had relationships with several women whom he did have sex with on the first date, totally contradicting his previous advice. Of course, he recognized this and also saw the humor in it. Anyway, I know it’s an opinion thing, but what do you think? Leave me a comment. Are you male or female, single or married, and your age range (20s, 30s, 40s, 50s, etc.) . If you don’t want to comment, at least take my poll!

As for me, I don’t think that there is a cut and dry answer. I’m a single female in my 30s and I really think it all depends on many factors.

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I wrote a blog earlier in which I mentioned that my son and I went to Lowe’s. I didn’t say much more about it, either positive or negative yet I come home tonight and discovered that Lowe’s has a site called Lowe’s Red Apron in which they linked me. Weirdness in my opinion. I do shop at Lowe’s, more frequently lately due to the purchase of my home. Other than the convenience factor, that is about the only reason that I shop there. Getting service is pretty difficult. I always have to track someone down. I don’t know if it’s just my perception, but the male customer’s seem to have employees following them, offering to help while us females have to search high and low for employees. I have had some wonderful male employees, but more often than not, they don’t really seem to want to give me the time of the day. Maybe they assume that I don’t have a clue what I’m doing. The women, on the other hand, are usually very friendly and will even joke and interact. I don’t know. I’d think that maybe it was just me, but I have heard other women say the same thing and I don’t feel this way about any other store. 

So, for you men that think women don’t do handiwork, let me tell you about some of the things that I have done. I have done these alone, researching if necessary and without the help of a professional. I have completely taken apart a toilet in order to repair parts, repaired a faulty shower knob, replaced numerous door knobs and locks, replaced handles on sliding glass doors, replaced screen doors, cut and installed wire around the foundation of my home, rebuilt a pond, fixed leaky sinks, caulked entire bathrooms, of course I have painted walls and ceilings, moved a whole home entirely on my own across state lines, repaired appliances, repair holes in walls…the list is long. 

I am woman, hear me roar!!  🙂

I wonder if Lowe’s will be linking this particular post to my blog. Hmmmm….

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There are two types of people in this world: those who like to talk and those who like to listen. I suppose it’s good that there are both types as a world filled with talkers would be insane while a world filled with listeners would be deadly quiet. I’m sure you know the type of people that I am referring to. You know that friend that is always the center of attention with great stories to tell? The one that lets everyone know about how perfect last night’s date was, exactly what both people wore and what they ate? The talker never realizes when the listener has stopped listening and the listener is so good at listening that she can float in and out of the conversation and still know exactly what the talker is talking about even though the listener has not given the talker her full attention for the past 20 minutes. 

The listener is the person that sits quietly and nods at just the right time, adding a few verbal cues here and there, but never really saying much. It isn’t until you notice the engagement ring on her hand that you realize first of all that she has a boyfriend and second of all that she has been dating him for three years! Furthermore, they have extensively traveled the world over the past few years and you had no knowledge of this despite the fact that you consider her one of your best friends.

As a listener, I can share that it is an amazing thing and even, if you will, a God given gift. All of my life I have been amazed how virtual strangers will approach me and without much prodding (if any!), they pour their life story out for me to hear. As a teenager working in a department store, we were required to ask customers why they were returning items. One day, early on in the job, a man started telling all about how he and his finace had broken up with details as to why and that was the reason that he was returning her clothing. It was horrible and sad, I was young and did not know what to say, so I vowed to NEVER ask a customer again! 

I have a new friend that is a listener. It’s very odd to me. Those of you that know me know that I had some serious health issues last year. 9 months later, I am still in the recovery stages and I have permanent life long damage as a result. This friend is an online friend that I have never actually met, we just have small email conversations – no big deal. However, I have always been the listener in my friendships and it is very odd for me to have this role reversed. He checks in with me and makes sure that I am ok. When I ask him questions, he may skim over them with a quick answer, but he never really lets the focus be on him, it’s always about making sure that I am ok. I am confident that I am not receiving special treatment from him, that this is his personality and that he is like this with several people on the board, yet it has me pondering tonight. 

To have two listeners become friends really puts quite the twist on things. I like that someone seems to care, yet it really bothers me that they are not sharing. The irony is that when I am with my talker friends, sometimes I wish that they would just stop and listen. Kind of crazy. 

What makes a person a talker or a listener? Does it go back to the old nature vs. nurture? Is it a God given gift or role in this life or is it influenced more by the way that we were raised? Or, is it all of the above? Growing up in my family of four, I am the only listener. Even though I wouldn’t classify my mom as a talker, she is by no means a listener.

I suppose I don’t really have a point, merely pondering tonight. It’s an odd twist to have someone care. I wish I could find that in my daily life…a man to make sure that I really am ok at the end of the day. As this friend once told me, I hold hands all day long in my career, at the end of the day, it would sure be nice to have someone hold mine. Wow. He figured me out fast.

14 years, 1 month and 19 days…

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